So, immediately after Kendrick Lamar's lost the Grammy win about a month ago, I was completely baffled at how this could be the case and had to download Macklemore's The Heist to make sure I wasn't completely crazy. While the unbelievable boundaries that Kendrick pushed with his GKMC album seemed to be unparalleled this year, there could be a possibility that I completely missed how much better Macklemore's album was. I heard a couple of tracks off of it on the radio and generally overall liked them. However, after going through all of them and listening a second time, I just didn't get it. While I admit that the album is above quality work, I just couldn't see how anyone who could consider themselves a connoisseur of hip hop would rank that over GKMC. Macklemore even admitted as much, as he texted Kendrick after to let him know that even HE thought he was robbed (very classy move on Macklemore's part, BTW). Overall, the loss by Kendrick at the Grammy's offered many lessons that I think we could all take in consideration for our lives.
THE BEST DOESN'T ALWAYS WIN
I know we all would like to think we live in a fair world, and if you work hard and do what is asked of you, you will be successful. Hogwash. There are so many different influences and prejudices that people have of which you may have no idea. We live in a world in which people have very ingrained beliefs about others based on how they were raised and their specific life experiences. For this reason, you may be put in a situation in which you may be the better candidate for a promotion or another job, but because they just don't "connect" with you, you could lose out on it. By understanding this simple fact in life, you could continue to have a positive outlook on the situation by knowing that you didn't lose because you had an inferior performance or did poor quality work, but because the situation was not geared in your favor. Now, this isn't to say that all situations are like this, and sometimes you do lose because you suck, but this just helps keeps things in perspective that negative outcomes are not always the results of negative inputs if there are ancillary influences that can skew the results. This will help you keep an positive outlook on your road to success.
THERE ARE ALWAYS THINGS OUTSIDE OF YOUR CONTROL
Kendrick had no control over who was judging him that day. Needless to say, if the judges were a group of individuals who truly listen to hip hop on a regular basis and understand that what Kendrick Lamar created was special and only comes around every 5-6 years or so in the hip hop world, this would've been a no-brainer. However, the judges had backgrounds in all different genres of music and I would guess the majority rarely listen to hip hop, if ever. Why one would let people vote on a genre that they are not truly experts in is confusing to me. It's like having NFL coaches vote on who's the most valuable NBA player. They are both sports, right? It's utterly preposterous. For that reason, however, there were things that Kendrick Lamar just had no control over. This is very comparable to life in which the person who has to make a decision on your career or the various circumstances you are put in throughout life are in no way controlled by you. You may not have the same contacts and connections as someone else applying for the same position. You may not have gone to the same Ivy league school and worked on your golf game at the age of seven as some others who may be more "chum" with the boss. You can't control this and have to remember to continue to work hard on those things you can while accepting and not dwelling on those that you cannot.
DON'T LET UNFAIRNESS GET YOU DOWN AND STOP YOU FROM MOVING ON
Often, I will hear about individuals who are passed over for a promotion and immediately quit their job because they feel they were wronged. While, there may be instances in which this is the right thing to do, it often comes across as extremely petty and childish. If you weren't considering leaving your current job before missing out on a promotion, why do it immediately afterwards? If this is your 3rd "passing over," that's a different story, but if it's your first, try a different approach. As Kendrick Lamar responded to the questions of whether he was robbed or not, he was very gracious in his response and said Macklemore had a great album and was as deserving of the award as anybody (something I'm sure Kanye could learn from). You can demonstrate this same type of class by accepting when things don't go your way and instead try to learn as much as possible of how you could've changed the outcome for the next go-around. What could you have done better? What could you have done to counter or mitigate those things that were outside of your control? By consistently analyzing what you could've done to put yourself in a different situation, you are being proactive in planning ways to make sure this never happens again. This is a much more effective and impactful strategy than to just quit or sulk. Anyone could do that.
Overall, Kendrick's loss was personal to me, as I felt it was another indication that preferential prejudice still exist in 2014 - even among individuals whom you think would be more open-minded based on the industry in which they work. I was inspired, however, to see how much one can learn from Kendrick response and attitude, as he demonstrates the resolve of someone who knows he is talented and will not be denied. For this reason, instead of sulking and crying foul the next time something doesn't go your way unfairly, use this situation as fuel to ignite an even deeper desire and drive for you to prove others wrong. I'm sure Kendrick is, and I can't wait for his next album to see its results.
Ken Middleton is an Account Manager at TEKsystems that specializes in IT staffing and services. He is a graduate of UNC-Pembroke and current MBA student at Scheller College of Business at Georgia Tech.
Saturday, March 22, 2014
Saturday, March 1, 2014
Trade offs - The Crux of Success
Earlier this week, I was thinking in the shower (my usual location of great epiphanies), and I thought occurred to me that seemed so simple, I wondered why I hadn't thought of this before. I was thinking about what I had to do for the next three days in relation to my work and personal schedule and realized that there was no way that I could do everything. Therefore, I had to make some trade offs to decide which one of the many activities I had lined up for the week would provide the most "bang for the buck" and ROI (I have to use words like this from time to time to feel like the 70k that I'm "investing" at Georgia Tech for my MBA is being used for something now). From this thought, I decided that the night hanging with the fellows at Twin Peaks probably wasn't more important than my National Black MBA networking event, so that would have to wait for later. Also from this, however, the great truth hit me that life is itself about trade offs and the super successful are those who consistently make the right trade offs for their lives to give up that which can wait for that which will yield dividends for their future. There are three main reasons for this:
YOU CAN'T GAIN SOMETHING WITHOUT GIVING UP SOMETHING
In life, the one resource that will always be finite for each of us is TIME. This makes the planet a zero-sum world, in which our decision to participate in one activity directly affects our ability to do something else at that time. Many people do not ever consider this when they are making decisions. For some reason, they never consider how a decision will add extra burden to their lives and then are extremely surprised when they are not able to do everything they once did in relation to their new endeavor. For example, when many people decide to get a dog as a pet, they often think about how much fun it is going to be to play with the dog when they get home and run around and care for him/her in the afternoons during their walk. They don't think about the 15-30 minutes they are going to have to get up earlier to take the dog out each morning or the time they are going to miss from work every day if they don't have a dog sitter to take the dog out during lunch. While this may only take 30-60 minutes per day of time during the work week, multiply that by five days and you have 2.5-5 hours per week that could be spent increasing your knowledge or polishing up a report for a presentation. While this may not seem like a lot of time to some people, this time could make a HUGE difference over one's career, especially when one is starting out. Whenever you make a decision, you have to look at what you will have to give up for it and then game plan ways to get that back if you feel it is something you need to be successful.
WHAT YOU ARE GIVING UP WILL OFTEN MAKE THE EFFECT OF WHAT YOU ARE GAINING STRONGER
It goes without saying that there are certain combinations that don't seem to match. If you are going to begin a hardcore exercise program each afternoon, you routine of having desert at lunch every day is probably going to make it hard for you to enjoy your workout that afternoon (think drinking warm milk right before a long jog). When making trade offs, understanding those things that will make it harder for you to be successful at whatever new endeavor you are taking on and eliminating them will increase your chance of success dramatically. Sometimes this can be very difficult to do because we get up in the habit of doing the same things each day or each week. However, simple changes in one's life can make a tremendous impact on how successful someone can be when trying something new. If you know that your friends always want to go out and drink on Fridays after work, but you have decided that Friday is going to be one of your gym days, don't put yourself in a situation in which you tempt yourself by going there and promising you will only have ONE beer. Not only will this not put you in a position of failure to need the willpower to say no after one, but your decision to not drink at all will make your Friday work out that much better and effective once you get into it.
WHAT YOU GIVE UP, YOU CAN OFTEN GET BACK LATER WITH A MUCH RICHER RETURN
The concept of delayed gratification is one of the greatest indicators of a success in a person's life. A study was done in which young kids who were able to delay gratification of one cookie immediately for 15 minutes to get two cookies later went on to do much better in school and life by possessing this trait and understanding at such an early age. By making trade offs and focusing on the important things now, you don't give up fun for your life, you just put it off a little while until you are in the position to enjoy it without it affecting what you are accomplishing now. For some, this could mean no ice cream until Saturday after you've finished all of your working out for the week and feel you have earned it as your cheat meal. For others, it could mean staying at home on a Friday or Saturday night studying to earn a degree while your friends are out partying all night. For the person who earns the degree, the attainment of the improved lifestyle (mostly through having access to more money) this person will have after the degree will allow him/her to enjoy a much more enjoyable and pleasure time when they are able to go out and have fun with their friends. Often the friends who were partying so hard before will be nowhere close to the level of financial security that this person will have that allow him/her to travel all over the world if desired.
At the end of the day, trade offs are the things that allow us to truly be able to make better decisions in our lives. We can't have everything (and those that try end up in very difficult situations, e.g. Tiger Woods), so we have to consistently make decisions about what we want for our lives by deciding what is important to us. By consistently evaluating these things, we are then able to better view our lives and know how to create the future that we desire. The truth will always be evident that giving up a LITTLE now can lead to a LOT later.
Ken Middleton is an Account Manager at TEKsystems that specializes in IT staffing and services. He is a graduate of UNC-Pembroke and current MBA student at Scheller College of Business at Georgia Tech.
YOU CAN'T GAIN SOMETHING WITHOUT GIVING UP SOMETHING
In life, the one resource that will always be finite for each of us is TIME. This makes the planet a zero-sum world, in which our decision to participate in one activity directly affects our ability to do something else at that time. Many people do not ever consider this when they are making decisions. For some reason, they never consider how a decision will add extra burden to their lives and then are extremely surprised when they are not able to do everything they once did in relation to their new endeavor. For example, when many people decide to get a dog as a pet, they often think about how much fun it is going to be to play with the dog when they get home and run around and care for him/her in the afternoons during their walk. They don't think about the 15-30 minutes they are going to have to get up earlier to take the dog out each morning or the time they are going to miss from work every day if they don't have a dog sitter to take the dog out during lunch. While this may only take 30-60 minutes per day of time during the work week, multiply that by five days and you have 2.5-5 hours per week that could be spent increasing your knowledge or polishing up a report for a presentation. While this may not seem like a lot of time to some people, this time could make a HUGE difference over one's career, especially when one is starting out. Whenever you make a decision, you have to look at what you will have to give up for it and then game plan ways to get that back if you feel it is something you need to be successful.
WHAT YOU ARE GIVING UP WILL OFTEN MAKE THE EFFECT OF WHAT YOU ARE GAINING STRONGER
It goes without saying that there are certain combinations that don't seem to match. If you are going to begin a hardcore exercise program each afternoon, you routine of having desert at lunch every day is probably going to make it hard for you to enjoy your workout that afternoon (think drinking warm milk right before a long jog). When making trade offs, understanding those things that will make it harder for you to be successful at whatever new endeavor you are taking on and eliminating them will increase your chance of success dramatically. Sometimes this can be very difficult to do because we get up in the habit of doing the same things each day or each week. However, simple changes in one's life can make a tremendous impact on how successful someone can be when trying something new. If you know that your friends always want to go out and drink on Fridays after work, but you have decided that Friday is going to be one of your gym days, don't put yourself in a situation in which you tempt yourself by going there and promising you will only have ONE beer. Not only will this not put you in a position of failure to need the willpower to say no after one, but your decision to not drink at all will make your Friday work out that much better and effective once you get into it.
WHAT YOU GIVE UP, YOU CAN OFTEN GET BACK LATER WITH A MUCH RICHER RETURN
The concept of delayed gratification is one of the greatest indicators of a success in a person's life. A study was done in which young kids who were able to delay gratification of one cookie immediately for 15 minutes to get two cookies later went on to do much better in school and life by possessing this trait and understanding at such an early age. By making trade offs and focusing on the important things now, you don't give up fun for your life, you just put it off a little while until you are in the position to enjoy it without it affecting what you are accomplishing now. For some, this could mean no ice cream until Saturday after you've finished all of your working out for the week and feel you have earned it as your cheat meal. For others, it could mean staying at home on a Friday or Saturday night studying to earn a degree while your friends are out partying all night. For the person who earns the degree, the attainment of the improved lifestyle (mostly through having access to more money) this person will have after the degree will allow him/her to enjoy a much more enjoyable and pleasure time when they are able to go out and have fun with their friends. Often the friends who were partying so hard before will be nowhere close to the level of financial security that this person will have that allow him/her to travel all over the world if desired.
At the end of the day, trade offs are the things that allow us to truly be able to make better decisions in our lives. We can't have everything (and those that try end up in very difficult situations, e.g. Tiger Woods), so we have to consistently make decisions about what we want for our lives by deciding what is important to us. By consistently evaluating these things, we are then able to better view our lives and know how to create the future that we desire. The truth will always be evident that giving up a LITTLE now can lead to a LOT later.
Ken Middleton is an Account Manager at TEKsystems that specializes in IT staffing and services. He is a graduate of UNC-Pembroke and current MBA student at Scheller College of Business at Georgia Tech.
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