So, if you ask me, there is about a 99% chance that
the Heat are going home Sunday night very disappointed with how their season
ended. Pop and Timmy are just too good
at what they do, and their hunger after what happened last year is just too
strong to be denied. If the Heat are
able to make history and pull off one of the most amazing comebacks of all time
that would be awesome to watch. However,
what disturbs me is the large group of people who are so happy that
the Heat are going to lose and would want nothing better than to see this
occur. It’s not that these people are
Spurs fans. No. No. No. They are Heat Haters and the large group of
these individuals throughout the world seems to continue to grow. Urban dictionary defines hating as “when one
puts down the success or fortune of others due to jealousy.” While I don’t
think that all the people who dislike Lebron James and the Heat are exactly “jealous”
of him, I do think there is something wrong when someone else lack of success
actually makes you happy. There are
several reasons that I think people should do away with hating and move on to
focusing on more positive things in life to make our world better. These reasons are simple.
HATING BREEDS NEGATIVITY
Hating is probably one of the most natural negative things
one can do. Think about it. It’s the act
of being happy at the failure of someone else but their failure in no way
affects your success in any measure. It’s
similar to all the Carolina fans out that were happy that Duke lost in the first
round to Macon. I could never quite understand
this. I’m from North Carolina, and I’m a Duke fan. If Duke plays Carolina, I
want Duke to win, but if Carolina plays anyone else, it doesn’t affect me in
any way. At any rate, I would probably
root for Carolina as long as they weren’t playing Duke as I would be proud
that a team from the ACC and my home state would win. This keeps me positive when I’m at a party
and I’m cheering on with my friends for Carolina to win. It shows a sense of sportsmanship and camaraderie
to one’s fellow opponent. This is in
contrast to the guy whose team lost and now he is only rooting against the team
that beat him. That guy is usually
considered a nuisance at most parties because even though he doesn’t have a dog
in the fight, he hopes one dog dies. It just seems somewhat sinister and evil.
Others around you would notice, and no one likes to hang around with negative
people.
HATING TAKES FOCUS AWAY FROM HOW YOU CAN GET BETTER
Have you ever been passed up for a promotion at work and
instantly think that the person that got it didn’t deserve it? Do you then begin to secretly hope that this
person fails so you would be proven right?
This is another form of hating and is as dangerous as the previous
example because it actually hurts you in a more direct way. While you are
focusing on hoping this individual fails, you are missing out on the fact that perhaps
there was a real reason that you were passed up for the promotion and haven’t
done an analysis on why this was the case to improve. It would be like the Indiana
Pacers rooting for the Spurs because they couldn’t beat the Heat. This actually would take away from what they
should actually be focusing on, which is how can they get better to beat the
Heat next year. Overall, this just focuses your energy on the wrong things. We only have so much energy that we
are able to give to something, and if part of that energy is focused on hoping
someone else fails, this is taking away from our focus on how we can grow each
day to get better and improve ourselves for our future success.
HATING SHOWS A LACK OF CONFIDENCE IN YOUR ABILITY TO BE
SUCCESSFUL
The last point is very subtle but I feel it is very
true. I believe that some individuals
who consistently “hate” on others in the spotlight do so because deep down
inside they don’t ever feel they will be put in a position to be that
successful and have yet to understand the tremendous amount of sacrifice and
effort it takes to get to that level. If
you look at any individual who is truly successful at his job, whether it is in
the business world or athletic field, there is a sense of respect and
admiration for others who have made it to the top of their mountain in some way. The
reason for this is because these individuals know the amount of effort it takes
to get there and, while none of us are free from criticism, we shouldn’t have
people who dislike us for no good reason just because of who we are. Individuals who are at this height in their
life or feel they are going to get there one day are always happier to
celebrate someone’s achievement than to tear them down. It is usually those individuals who are
resigned to their place in the world and have no true aspirations or ability to
improve their plight in life, who are the ones who are the most vehement
against the success of others. Since
they feel there is no chance of them ever being in a position to be criticized
by others for no reason, they have no compassion for these people and instead
decide to join the masses who would rather hurl insults at them and desire for
their demise than the individuals who respect their level of success because
they know they will match it one day. These people are generally less apt to
criticize because they hope they will receive this same compassion from others
when they reach their level of success one day.
So, please think about it. The next time you find yourself wanting
to gain solace at another person’s misfortunes, fight this feeling of
negativity and instead focus on the positive things in life to improve yourself
and your position overall. And while there
are still those who refuse to give up this notion of Heat/Lebron-hating to make
them feel better about their own lives, I’ve always reminded of the poetic phrase
from the great urban philosopher Sean Carter who once said (and I’m
paraphrasing here) “What you eat doesn’t affect my digestive health (as Erin
Andrews would say).” #goheat
Ken Middleton is an Account Manager at TEKsystems that specializes in IT staffing and services. He is a graduate of UNC-Pembroke and current MBA student at Scheller College of Business at Georgia Tech.
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